I didn't post anyting for a few days because I was feeling rather blue. I totally didn't expect and wasn't prepared for the situation at the Oncology clinic. Everyone tries their best to maintain a cheerful disposition so that the sadness precipitated by one patient doesn't spill over to the next. I wish I had the Heitian from Heroes to wipe my memory of every patient before I see and hear the next. I'm just glad out of the 4 days I spend in UMMC, I will only have to spend one in the Oncology ward.

Actually I not only felt depressed after 7 hours there, I felt really angry and frustrated. This is targeted not at the patients but some of their family members. Its mind boggling that some patients would rather trust bomohs and sinsehs rather than oncologists. Aargh! Their family members don't help either and these patients come back only to have us tell them that the best thing for them is the Hospice. The funny thing is that they get really angry when you mention 'Hospice' because to them Hospice = Abandonment and Death when in reality, they will get the most complete care there which includes pain management and counselling on top of continued medication.

Wednesday and Thursday are my favourite days. Time spent in the Surgical Clinic and Operating Theatres some how refreshes me and keeps me looking for the week to come. Praise God I haven't witnessed any deaths at the operating table yet. The one thing I'm really sure so far is that Oncology is definitely not for me.